Updates, Week 10-11.5

In some ways, I’m shocked by how little our babies have changed in 2+ months. They’re still small, they still communicate by crying, they still can’t read and astrophysics is just outside of their comprehension.

That said, I’m amazed at how much they’ve changed since birth. C has filled out, no longer looks perpetually pissed off, has grown a good swath of hair, and can hold his head up (for a bit) and roll over (once, as of today).

M (who, BTW, retained his glorious patch of spiked-up birth hair) is holding his head up for longer than ever (as of today), is cooing and beeping, reaches out for us (though he doesn’t seem to know what to do when he grabs us), and has a vice-like grip. C managed a roll-over at just past 10 weeks, can hold his head up for longer and longer increments, and is making a mockery of the ages listed inside his clothes.

Both boys are following us with their eyes and heads, kicking their legs, and – best of all – smiling. C is the quickest to smile, especially when mommy is singing him the Alphabet Song. M is a bit more reserved, saving smiles for when you least suspect it, but unleashing them with a genuine glee that blows me away each time. (I’ve also discovered that tousling his hair usually elicits a smile.) Either way, damned if those smiles aren’t cuter than a hamster climbing into a fleece mitten while wearing a little bunny costume and nibbling on a candy heart that says “Hmstr Luv”.

Where was I…?

Oh, right, updates. Aside from those above, we’ve had a few things going on since my last post. (Author’s note: I’ve been trying to get this post written for about two weeks now, but, you know, busy with babies.)

I’m almost definitely going to go part-time at my job. I’m still looking for another local and/or WAH job, but until then, I am stuck where I’m at. After crunching some numbers though, and considering the cost of child care and commuting, it looks like we can (barely) cover expenses with me working PT. I’m looking at working three days every other week and four days the other weeks. This is still unconfirmed (technicalities at work need to get hammered out), but it’s looking like I’ll be a stay-at-home dad (SAHD) three or four days a week.

On our two-month pediatrician appointment, the boys were both in pretty good shape. The only concerns were M’s reflux and constant head-tilting to the right. Rice cereal was suggested to increase the viscosity of his formula, but we’ve reached an impasse as to whether or not to use it. The Internet seems to be pretty much split down the middle when it comes to using cereal at this age, and we’re erring on the side of caution. As for his neck, he was diagnosed with Congenital Muscular Torticollis, known in laymen’s terms as “scrunched neck from being crowded in the womb”. We’ll be seeing a physical therapist soon to straighten him out before he looks like he’s perpetually shrugging.

Vaccines were given, and C had a slight fever afterwards. Some people have concerns about vaccines causing autism or other problems, but we felt pretty comfortable both in getting vaccinations and in broadly labeling anti-vaxxers as total mass-hysteria suckers.

The question I get most at work is “Are they sleeping through the night yet?”. The answer is “no,” but they’re doing better than they were. They’re getting up less frequently, and when they do, a quick diaper change and or short feeding at the breast is usually enough to get them back to sleep without much fuss. They barely wake up to eat (if at all), and don’t start getting truly fussy until five-ish in the morning. We’ll see how this goes when Kat goes back to work and has to feed them early and get them back to sleep until I get up to take over their care before leaving them to the sitter or staying home myself. We had a practice run this past week, and it went mostly smoothly. Kat is all about schedules, and I’m all about letting them eat when hungry and sleep when tired, since they seem to do what they want anyway.

Speaking of Kat going back to work, yesterday (Monday, June 30) was her first day back, sort of a practice run before returning full time next week. I was in charge of the boys for a whole day, and I’m happy to say we all survived unscathed, if off schedule. Our bachelors’ day out took us to the mall, a sandwich shop, and a park for a bit of fresh air before ending at home where we waited for mommy to arrive. Considering it was her first day away since the boys were born, I think she did pretty well. I’m proud, in fact, that she wasn’t panicky, texting or calling every half hour, or sending me constant reminders of how she’d do things.

Once she goes back to work, we’ll have a sitter/nanny who we found on Care.com, a site for finding…well…sitters and nannies. Kat interviewed a few women, and after the first pick was unable to meet our scheduling needs, we called our (close) second pick, and she was able to work with us…at first. This was about the time we decided that I would be going to part time at my job. Add to that K’s new schedule which will allow her a day off and two days working in town each week, and we didn’t have the hours she was looking for. She’ll be taking care of the boys for the next month or so, but when I switch to part time, we’ll need to renegotiate or find someone new.

Today (Tuesday, July 1), Kat took the boys to Poma Fertility, the fertility clinic where we had our successful IVF to show them what a success their painful intrusions into our nethers had netted. I’m mentioning this mainly as an opportunity to plug Poma; you won’t find a nicer, more caring, more dedicated team of outstanding fertility experts anywhere. We felt then and feel now like part of a family, and if you’re in the greater Seattle area (or anywhere else; what’s the cost of a plane ticket at this point?) I couldn’t recommend any place more.

This also brought the fam within a few miles of my work, so they dropped in, causing an hour-long cessation of any sort of productivity. In perfect stereotypical fashion, a few men came by and nodded approvingly and mentioning that C looks like me before wandering off again, and every woman available crowded around to behold the fruit of our loins.

To be filed under “cherish every moment”, I offer the first (almost) two months of our babies’ lives. We’ve been elated, exhausted, happy, angry, sad, optimistic, drained, and more. We’ve cooed over our boys one minute and sobbed when they wouldn’t stop crying the next. We’ve bonded tighter than ever but also had fights. I’ve been more focused from the stress and more discombobulated from lack of sleep (and also that same stress). In this short time, every single aspect of our lives has changed. Long story short: HOLY CRAP!!! OUR BOYS ARE ALMOST TWO MONTHS OLD ALREADY!!! WHERE DID THE TIME GO??? Kat is going back to work in a few days, and someone we found on the Internet will be taking care of them. We won’t be spending as much time with them, and suddenly the last several weeks seem gone just like that. A portion of this time loss can be blamed on lack of sleep and the flurry of doctors, family, and periods of adjustment, but the bottom line is the warnings were true: it goes by so fast.

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